Why do people rush into serious relationships or get remarried after only a few weeks of being divorced?
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A common issue you hear about is newly engaged couples who haven’t even been divorced that long. I think the fear of being alone is one of the biggest reasons people rush into relationships!
I know from experience that being alone after a divorce can be terrifying. You feel isolated and lonely. However, having the ability to be alone after a divorce is a special blessing that brings self-confidence and self-love.
Many people who get divorced are so used to being married that they don’t know how to be alone. They’ve spent virtually no time alone, so they really don’t know how to be solo. But as with most things, you get used to it. I don’t mean this in a negative way. In fact, I think it’s great!
If people felt more comfortable being alone, the rate of divorce in second marriages would be much lower. It means that people would take their time to find the right person and not rush into a bad relationship. They would then put in the work for a strong and healthy long-term relationship.
Table of Contents
- Why do people rush into serious relationships or get remarried after only a few weeks of being divorced?
- So if you are living a single life in midlife, here is how time alone can benefit you:
- Use this time to learn more about who you are and what you like as an individual!!
So if you are living a single life in midlife, here is how time alone can benefit you:
Time for Processing the Aftermath of your Divorce.
The first thing to remember is that you may not be ready to date. The second thing to remember is that you may not be ready to move on. Divorces are complicated, traumatic things, and as a result, they leave many people feeling like they’re in mourning for their former serious relationships. It’s normal for this period of self-reflection and healing—the aftermath of divorce—to take some time before it feels comfortable for you again (if ever).
Some people go through a grieving process when they lose someone close to them; similarly, your marriage has ended, so it’s normal if you feel sad or depressed about the loss of your partner’s presence in your life even after the divorce has been finalized. You might also feel angry at your ex-spouse for ending things on such bad terms with them or regretful about how things ended between the two of you; either way, processing these emotions can take time and space away from dating because they take up energy within our minds during this period where we’re trying hard just to get ourselves back together again!
Time for Uncomplicated Interactions.
When you’re single, there is no need to ask yourself these questions:
- What’s the other person thinking about?
- Is this something the other person will be interested in?
- Will I have to explain myself or justify my actions?
This is a nice freedom from worry and anxiety, and it means that you can interact with people without constantly worrying about how they think of your actions.
Being single can also help you develop stronger, more independent social skills. Being in a relationship means that your social life will revolve around the other person’s friends and family, but when you’re single, you’ll have to meet people on your own. This can be scary at first, but it can also help improve your confidence and independence over time.
Better Sleep and Better Health
If you are a cuddler, you may find the first few weeks of sleeping alone quite difficult. However, on the whole, single people actually sleep better than their married counterparts. As humans, we’re more inclined to be interrupted at night than those that sleep alone. This includes snoring, rolling around the bed, or even waking up to go to the bathroom. Couples can experience up to 3x more interruptions while asleep than those who sleep alone – so cherish your uninterrupted moments!
On top of that, say goodbye to arguments about the sides of the bed, alarms, the number of blankets, and whether the door stays open or closed. As a single person, you get to make all the decisions, and if that means sleeping like a starfish across your double bed, so be it.
- Better Sleep: A study published in Sleep found that single men spend an average of 8 hours and 39 minutes sleeping each night, while married men get just 7 hours and 17 minutes of shut-eye on average per night.
- Increased Immunity: When you’re getting enough restful sleep every night (like when you’re single!), your immune system is stronger than ever before: at least according to science!
- Less Stress & Anxiety Levels: Another benefit of sleeping well? Less anxiety! If it feels like your days are filled with constant stressors—from work deadlines to family drama—you’ll find yourself feeling more relaxed after getting plenty of rest at night (or even during daylight hours).
Time to Focus on your Kids!
To be honest, the only thing that really sucks about being single after a divorce is that it means you’re not going to have a family of your own. Your children will still be there, though—and if you want them to grow up healthy and happy, it’s important for you to make sure they spend as much time as possible with their father. Now is the perfect opportunity for this!
It’s natural for parents who aren’t living together anymore to feel awkward around each other at first. But if both people are committed enough to their kids’ well-being, they should eventually come around and realize that spending time together is good for everyone involved (including themselves). You’ll get an opportunity to know each other again on a different level than before; maybe even better than before! And don’t forget: You never know what might happen between now and when your kids are grown up—you could end up falling in love again someday too!
No More Feeling the Outsider in a Married Couple’s World.
Finally, you are the only person accountable for your actions. You can do things alone without feeling guilty. You can make your own decisions without having to consult anyone else. You don’t need to take someone along with you on a trip or ask them if they want to go out for dinner when they’d rather stay home and watch TV instead. And there is no waiting around while your spouse gets ready because you know that no matter how long it takes him, it won’t be nearly as long as it would take if both of us got ready at once!
This means that you get things done at YOUR OWN PACE—in YOUR OWN TIME! The best part? No one will be annoyed by it!
Total Control over your Finances and Taxes!
In the event that you are the only spouse to keep your job after a divorce, your income will be used exclusively for yourself. You can use this money however you want without having to consult anyone else. This means that if you feel like spending all of it on shoes and chocolate cake right now, go ahead! If you want to save up for future purchases or invest in other goals like starting a business, by all means, do so! The benefits of financial independence are endless:
It’s easier to pay off debts with one income instead of two (it will take less time).
You can buy what YOU want without having to worry about making compromises based on someone else’s needs (or tastes).
You can save enough money so when hard times hit again (and they will), there won’t be as much pressure financially because everything won’t fall apart as easily since there’s no one else relying on what little savings may exist at this point in time – and even if things do fall apart because life happens sometimes regardless how much planning is done beforehand–it’ll hurt less because there aren’t other people depending on those funds going away either…
You have No One to Answer to but Yourself.
Being single can be a wonderful time of self-discovery and self-care. Without the responsibility of the other person, you have the chance to focus on your own needs, goals, and priorities. You’ll learn what makes you happy and what doesn’t, whether it’s reading a book on a Saturday morning or spending a day out with friends. There’s no one else in the picture who has to be happy with whatever decision you make!
You will feel more confident in your abilities and trust your judgment if you take some time for yourself to rediscover your passions, make independent decisions, and be responsible for your own tasks. Whether it’s changing a tire, devising a monthly budget, or smoking a brisket, sooner or later in your single life, you are likely to be faced with a challenge that you have to attempt for the first time. Facing such challenges can actually help boost your confidence and your trust in yourself, which can make you stronger and happier in the long run.
Divorce is difficult and recovery can be a difficult process. It’s important to have support from your family and friends. You should never be afraid to ask for help when you need it, so do not hesitate to rely on those around you. As you deal with the struggles of being a single person, you’ll undoubtedly see new skills in yourself that you never noticed before.
Use this time to learn more about who you are and what you like as an individual!!
It’s easy to think that the only way to get over a divorce is simply time. But if you’re like me, you may have found yourself dating a few people and still feeling something was missing.
Being single after divorce offers you an opportunity to spend more time focusing on your own interests and learning about who you are as an individual.
Learning how to be independent in this way can be incredibly helpful in finding the right partner for you—and it might also help you realize that some of your previous partners weren’t right for other reasons than just timing issues!
Take this opportunity to learn what makes YOU happy, because when it comes down to it…that’s all we really need anyway!
I think it’s best people enjoy time alone being single in order to learn more about themselves and what they really want. Thank you for this insightful post.
Definitely Ezioma! Thank you for reading.
I think being by ourselves for a while is much needed; we can learn so much about ourselves and work on our growth and healing. This was a really great post!
Thank you Molly! 100% correct. It took me a long time to learn this but it’s never too late to try something new!
I think alone time is very valuable! These points are great and will definitely help anyone in this situation.
Thank you so much for reading!